


it's always been you

by little_drop_of_chlorine



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Julie Molina, Bisexual Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), ChildhoodBestFriends!AU, Everyone Is A Simp For Julie Molina, Friends to Lovers, Julie is an absolute queen, Pansexual Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms), Protective Sunset Curve, ive never tagged anything before help, jukebox lives in my head rent free, luke doesnt like people crying, they're both disasters, we dont like bobby in this house
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:07:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27688705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_drop_of_chlorine/pseuds/little_drop_of_chlorine
Summary: "And yes, he did come back over to play the next day."The childhood best friends to lovers I'm pretty sure nobody was asking for but am giving to the world anyway
Relationships: Alex & Julie Molina, Alex & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie, Alex & Luke Patterson & Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn & Julie Molina, Julie Molina & Reggie, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Kudos: 326





	1. if you haven’t dreamed it yet, add it to your wish list

**Author's Note:**

> why hello. Thank you for clicking on my story, I honestly thought no one would read this. 
> 
> The idea has been in my head for weeks and I just had to get it out. 
> 
> Also, this is the first fic that I'm actually posting, so I hope you like it *small anxiety noises*

Rose Molina loved change. She loved the change in the seasons, changes in the sky, changes in the city. She loved change in her job and change in her marriage and change with her relationship with her daughter (good change, that is.). She truly loved to just turn everything on its head and just run with it. 

Her daughter, Julie, on the other hand, could not disagree more. Julie hated it when the seasons changed, she wished that it could just be summer forever so it was warm outside (she hated the cold). She didn’t like it when the radio station changed or when she had to throw away clothes because she was too big for them. 

And she definitely did not like moving to the big ol loud place that her dad’s new job was at. Mom called it ‘LA’. Julie had seen LA in her cartoons. She didn’t like it in those either. She didn’t like how empty her new house felt, how cold and big and new it was. Their old house was smaller. Julie didn’t like the change in her house size. 

The only thing that Julie did like was her room. It was almost the exact same size and shape as her old one, just a different color. That was a change she was okay with. Her closet was a bit bigger too, but she didn’t care about that. As she finished arranging the stuffies on her bed. Looking at her work with as much self-pride as a five-year-old could muster, she ran downstairs to pull her mom up to come to look. Then she heard them. The voices. 

She crept down the stairs a little more to see a couple and a little boy standing at the door, talking to her parents. The lady had a round face and nice hair. The husband had glasses and a flannel shirt on. But it was the little boy that held her attention. 

His fingers were wiggling constantly, and his hair was a mess. His shirt was kinda rumpled and he kept bouncing up on his toes like he was about to jump. His eyes never stayed still, looking up and down and all around, until they finally saw her. He cocked his head to the side and gave her a small wave. She did not return it, electing instead to run down the stairs and hide behind her mom's legs. 

“Oh! Julie! There you are, baby!” Rose exclaimed. “These are the nice people that live across the street. This is Ms. Emily, Mr. Mitch, and their son Luke. Can you say hi?” The boy - Luke - was still looking at her. 

“Hi.” She mumbled. She didn’t like people all that much. There were no kids her age back in their old town (she didn’t know the name - she was five for goodness sake), so she kinda just played alone or listened to her mom make music. 

“Luke is only a year older than you, that means you might finally have a playmate! Does that make you happy?” Ms. Emily asked. She had a bit of a high voice, but her smile was kind. 

Julie shrugged, and all of the adults laughed. She didn’t understand. What had she done that was so funny? 

She stayed behind her mom as they kept talking, taking small looks at the boy every once in a while. He never stopped moving. It was almost annoying, but not at the same time. Julie’s mom said sometimes people had things they couldn’t control, and it was wrong to make them feel bad about it. Julie didn’t want to be mean if he couldn’t control it. 

The adults kept talking and talking. Julie was getting bored, and she could see that Luke was too. Julie spared him another glance and found that he had been looking at her. They stared at each other for a moment, before Julie took a quick glance up at her parents to make sure they didn’t see, then made a quick hand motion for him to follow her. He grinned and quickly shot out to the side and towards the stairs. 

They turned on the steps to check if the adults had noticed their quick escape from their never-ending “grown-up conversation”. They hadn’t, still chatting away about...whatever adults talked about. Julie really didn’t understand it. 

Then, the two runaways looked at each other again and raced up the stairs. Luke followed Julie as she walked down the hall to her new room. As she quietly shut the door behind them, she turned with a big smile to her unlikely partner-in-crime. 

“I don’t think they saw us.” Julie whispered. 

“I don’t think they did either.” Luke whispered back. Then their grins got bigger, and they started laughing like the children they were. They fell on the floor and laughed and laughed and laughed. Julie liked this weird boy who never stopped moving. 

“We were so sneaky.” Julie whispered once they caught enough air to speak. 

“Yeah, we were!” Luke punched a fist in the air like a goofball. “We should be spies! Oh! Or secret agents! Oh! Or superheroes!” Julie giggled. This boy was strange. 

“I have dolls. We could play as spies. I think Mr. CuddleBear is trying to steal the SuperGem, we gotta stop him.” She realized too late dolls were a girly thing to suggest, but luckily Luke didn’t seem to mind. He let out a gasp, putting both of his fists in the air again. 

“Then we gotta stop him! Who knows what he could do with that kind of magic?” Julie smiled again, racing across the room to her toy bin to get her two favriote dolls from inside. Before handing Jennifer over though, she made it very clear that if Luke broke her, there would be a price to pay.   
“Mr. CuddleBear will eat you if you hurt Jennifer. Just letting you know.” Luke smiled, gently taking the doll from her. 

“Don’t worry. I won’t hurt her. I know I would be super upset if someone hurt my teddy, so I won’t hurt your dolly. Promise.” Julie smiled. 

“Good. Now let's stop the evil monster!”

“Yeah!”

And so they played for hours and hours until their parents made them come down and eat dinner (literally, their parents talked for that long. Luke and Julie did not understand). Then they went back up and played some more until Luke had to go home. Mom and Dad said he could come back and play tomorrow if he wanted though.

And he kept his promise. Not once, in all of the hours they played did he hurt Jennifer. 

And yes, he did come back over to play the next day.


	2. and in just four minutes they knew each other for life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: *says i don't know when i'm going to post the next chapter*
> 
> also me: *posts it the next day* 
> 
> Chapter Title: Nikki by Forever the Sickest Kids 
> 
> again, kinda short, i promise, they will get longer
> 
> hope you like it!

“You’re what?” Julie was in shock. She couldn’t believe the words her best friend had just spoken to her. 

Julie and Luke had spent practically every day together since the day she got here a year ago, playing, baking cookies, listening to her moms music. Mr. Mitch called them “havoc wreckers”, whatever that meant. 

But this. This was a dramatic change that she wasn’t ready for. 

Luke nodded sadly. 

“I’m going to kindergarten.” He sounded like he was being sent off to war. “I asked her if I could just stay home to play with you but my mom says I have to go.” Luke looked grumpy. She had forgotten that he was older than her, meaning that he would start school before her, technically. 

“Does that mean we won’t be friends anymore?” That idea made Julie sad. Luke was her only friend, mainly because everyone else in the neighborhood was in highschool. Luke physically sagged at the thought. 

“I want us to be friends. I want us to be friends forever and ever.” Luke looked at her, eyes big and sad. Julie looked down and picked up Jennifer from the floor where they had been playing Spies again (it was their favorite). 

Holding her out to him, she said “Me too.” 

Smiles wide, they kept playing. 

***

The dreaded day had arrived.

Luke was going to school. 

He didn’t want to, of course. He would rather stay at home and play with Julie. But his mom said that he had to, and she promised that Julie would start school in a year too. So he picked up his lunchbox and backpack (both had guitars printed all over them) and walked with his mom out to the bus stop at the end of the street. There were people on the bench. He couldn’t see who, but there were definitely two people there. As they got closer he realized. Letting go of his mom's hand, he raced towards her, grinning. 

He halted in front of Julie and her dad, seconds before slamming into them. Julie smiled, but he could tell that she was sad by the way her shoulders were down. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked, though he didn’t really care why, he was just happy to see her. 

“My mom said it would make me a good friend if I waited for the bus with you, even if I can’t get on it.” She smiled fully now, all of her teeth showing as she rocked forward to let him know how excited she was about the idea. 

Not nearly as excited as he was though. 

“That's a fantastic idea.” His mom spoke from behind him. He nodded fervently. Sometimes, when he got excited, words got hard to form. 

Her smile kept getting brighter as she playfully grabbed him and pulled him towards the bench, already talking about Pokemon. 

When the bus came to get him, he didn’t feel so scared anymore. 

(She was there, waiting when he got off the bus too)

((And she was there the next morning. And the next afternoon))

(((It became their thing. Their parents no longer came to the bus stop because they knew: Luke and Julie were fine as long as they had each other.)))

***

“I can’t believe it's happening again.” He flopped down onto Julie's bed shaking the whole thing, his body taking up the entire width of it. 

“Hey! Careful! I don’t wanna mess this up.” Julie was painting her nails for her first day of fifth grade. Why? He didn’t know. All he could focus on was that he and Julie weren’t going to be in the same school anymore. 

They really only saw each other at recess anyway, so it didn’t make a huge difference, but he liked the comfort of having her nearby and across the hall - just in case. Like that one time that she got sick and her parents called him out too that way she wasn’t alone. Or that one time that a kid in her class kept making fun of her on the playground and Luke was able to make sure that he was always near her to keep the other guy from picking on her.   
Whatever the time, he just liked being within protecting-Julie-proximity. And the elementary school and the middle school were ten miles apart (he asked his mom). That was not protecting-Julie-proximity. 

“Sorry.” He mumbled. Maybe she didn’t care as much that he was going away to a new different school. He curled up on her bed and just watched her. Slow, methodical. It was soothing, in a way. They were such good friends at this point, sometimes they just sat like this, comfortable, companionable silence. 

He wasn’t aware how much time had passed (he couldn’t really read time if he was being honest, he just barely passed fifth grade), until Julie, with her new bright blue nails, started tugging on his arm. She grinned, pointing to her closet. His smile soon matched hers and he nodded so fast he thought his head might snap, running to shut her bedroom door, peeking out in the hall to make sure no one was nearby. 

Shooting Julie a thumbs up, he watched as she grabbed her desk chair and dragged it into her closet, jumping up on top of it and pushing the roof up. She jumps ever so slightly, pulling herself up into the small crawl space. 

Their space. 

They had found it a couple of years ago by accident, a small hidey-hole above her closet. They think it’s a part of the attic or something, but they don’t actually care. All that matters is that only they can get up, and only they know it exists. (They’re very careful when grown-ups are in the house, locking her bedroom door to make sure no one gets in and sees the chair in the middle of the closet.)

Julie and Luke had slowly decorated it until the space was their own. Blankets and pillows stacked in the corner, christmas lights acting as the only form of electricity across the short ceiling. (Luke couldn’t even stand up inside of it anymore). A bucket of sneaked snacks and a few toys leftover from their childhood finished it all up. 

They hung out up here a lot. It was theirs. No one else's. And they loved it. 

Luke followed up after Julie, having a lot easier of a time hoisting himself up and shimmying in. She plugged in the lights as he sat next to her, criss-cross applesauce. Looking at her, he realized that she looked almost as worried as he felt. 

She laid down, her head resting on his knee. On instinct, he started putting a small braid in her hair (yes she had taught him how to braid, shut up). They stayed like that for a while again. Just wallowing in losing each other, and enjoying each other's company. But eventually, Julie pipes up. 

“You really do start middle school tomorrow.” Her voice is soft, like she’s recounting a dream she’s not really sure happened. 

“Yeah. I guess I am. Why? You gonna miss me?” He was trying to make the separation more lighthearted, even though his real heart felt like lead at the thought. It’s a few beats before she responds. 

“yeah.” Her voice is even quieter than it was before. She finally looks up at him from her place on his knee. As a sixth grade boy, he normally doesn’t like people touching him - not his parents, not his aunts and uncles, not anyone - but it's different with Julie. “You’re gonna be too cool to hang out with an elementary kid like me.” 

He laughs at that. She is not amused. 

“Hey! Don’t laugh, it’s not funny!” He’s still laughing, and she smacks him lightly on his arm. 

“But it is.” He says, snickering. He looks down at her with a warm smile. “I’ll never be too cool for you Jules. Actually, I think you might be too cool for me.” That makes her laugh. 

And at that moment, that’s all Luke cares about. 

(She gets up early the next day to walk to the bus stop with him, and he stays late after the bus drops him off to walk home with her)

((They do it every day.))

(((It’s too bad nothing good lasts forever)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoop whoop, another one down! 
> 
> i really hope you guys are liking it! 
> 
> i'm not 100% sure i'm going to post chapter 3 tomorrow because i don't want to set a pattern of daily updates because that...that just won't happen, but be on the lookout for it! 
> 
> happy thanksgiving!


	3. you’re the one who makes me feel (so much less then i am)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! Story this is coming out so late. i meant to update yesterday, and then completely forgot. 
> 
> hope you guys enjoy this one, tried writing angst for the first time (and failed) 
> 
> i promise, i promise, i promise, the chapters will get longer, i swear! (sorry!)

Julie was beyond ecstatic. Her hair was up. Her skirt was on. Her breakfast was eaten. Her phone (yes, her real phone! Her parents wanted her to have one before she started middle school) was charged. Her songbook was in her bookbag. 

She was ready to rock and roll. 

Her mom rushed up to give her a hug. 

“Have a great day, mija!” Julie squeezed her mom tight. She wasn’t sure she was ready for this. But she couldn’t let her parents know that. 

“I will!” One last Mom-SquezeTM, and she was ready to go. Opening the door, she immediately felt better when she saw Luke standing there, already waiting for her. 

“Good Morning!” Skipping over to him, she was death gripping the straps of her bag. He grinned brightly at her. 

“Morning to you too. Ready to go?” She nodded, and they started walking. The closer they got to the bus stop, the more she felt like being sick. Luke definitely noticed. 

“You good, Jules?” Not trusting herself to look at him, she just nodded again, staring at the ground. “You sure?” He nudged her slightly with his elbow. 

Finally turning her face to him, she just let her body sag and shook her head, almost in tears. Although, the panicked look on Luke's face when he saw she was about to cry was almost enough to make her laugh (he hated it when people cried, especially girls, and especially her). 

Lucky for her, he knew what was up. He always did. 

“Don’t worry Jules. You’re gonna crush it! I had all the same teachers you have last year, and they’re all great. Plus, I talked about you a lot, so they know how awesome you are. Breathe. You’re okay.”

She did as he said, and breathed. She felt slightly better. She didn’t speak again until the bus came and they found a seat in the back. Shouldering him ever so slightly to get his attention out of his notebook, she gave him a small smile. 

“Thanks.” She whispered. His face split into a wide smile. 

“Anytime.” 

***

It had been horrible. Julie could barely see through her tears. Only a week into sixth grade and she already wanted it to be over. Kids were never mean back at her elementary school. But these kids were. These kids were so mean. The final bell rang, and she practically darted out of math. To her locker. Honestly, she just wanted to find Luke. He would understand. 

He would understand that her bow wasn’t childish, and her hair wasn’t ugly, and she wasn’t a ‘teachers pet’. They would go up into their space, eat cookies stolen from the kitchen and he would put braid her hair and it would all be okay. 

She couldn’t have been more wrong. 

She finally saw him on the sidewalk, walking with three boys she had never seen before, laughing. It made her feel slightly better to see her best friend happy. But as she approached him, and he saw her, his joy turned into...something else. 

The other boys saw her. The blonde one and the one in the leather jacket looked concerned. The other one looked annoyed. And Luke just looked...scared. Before she could say anything, the angry one rolled his eyes. 

“Are you going to move, crybaby?” He sneered. It was like a punch to the chest. But looking at Luke, he just turned away, not meeting her eyes. He didn’t defend her. He didn’t ask if she was okay. He wouldn’t even look at her. 

It felt like her entire world had been ripped out from under her feet. Right was Left, Up was Down, North was South, and Luke...wasn’t her friend. 

Her tears stopped momentarily; too shocked to keep crying. 

Then. 

She ran. She ran and ran and ran.

She couldn’t see anything, and she barely noticed her bus number in time to get on it. 

She curled up in the very back of the bus, placing her bag beside her. Fetal positioned in the leather seat, she silently sobbed all the way home. (Some subconscious part of her registered that Luke was also on this bus, and hadn’t even attempted to sit with her. That didn’t help.)

The moment the bus stopped, she was running again. She heard her name. His voice. She didn’t care. He made his choice. And it wasn’t her. 

Her parents weren’t home, her mom was out managing a new band and her dad had a wedding shoot. Carlos was still at school. Locking the door behind her, she sank down behind it, still sobbing. 

Bang!

A fist hit her door, more of a punch then a knock. 

“Jules! Julie! Please! Let me in! I’m sorry!” It only made her cry harder. She grabbed her bookbag and sprinted up the stairs, letting his desperate pleas fade behind her. She doesn’t even realize where she’s going until she's half-way up the crawl-space. Not bothering to turn on the string lights, she yanks the bow off of her head and hides her whole body under the first blanket her hands come into contact with. And there she lays. Quivering and crying. 

But suddenly there's a small creak from outside the blanket and she panics, thinking her parents have come home and found their space. However, reality has other plans. Peeking out from under her shield, she sees none other than the regretful gaze of Lukas Patterson. She glares at him and moves to cover her face again, but he reaches out, grabbing the blanket and gently pulling it back. She growls at him (yes growls, she’s upset), grabbing another blanket from behind her instead, and pulling that one over her instead. She hears him give a heavy sigh, not of exasperation...but something else. 

“Jules? Please. Come out.” She grunts like a small child, expressing her displeasure at the idea. She hears him pull himself all the way into their space. No. It was her space now. He had no claim to it. 

“Julie?” He tries again, gently tugging at her blanket. She throws it off in a huff. 

“How did you get in my house?” He scratches the back of his neck, and pulls a small object from his pocket. 

“I have a key.” Crap. She had forgotten about that. 

“Doesn’t give you the right to come in here. I don’t want you here.” He looks hurt at that, and she has to stop herself from apologizing. No. He deserves it, he was a jerk. 

“Julie, I’m sorry.” He reaches his hand forward, but she glares at him so hard, he pulls it away. 

“Doesn’t cut it.” Shaking her head furiously, she shimmies as far away from him as possible in the small area. “I needed you and you let your friends make fun of me. Do they even know I exist?” He physically flinches at the I needed you. 

“Of course they do Julie. Well, Alex and Reggie do. I hadn’t told Bobby cause I don’t know him that well. He was the one who called you- uh, made fun of you.” She curls tighter into a ball at the reminder. He schooches closer. She doesn’t protest.

“I talk about you all the time.” He insisted softly “Alex and Reggie thought you were so awesome, you had to be fictional.” She gives a small smile at that. He moves closer again, so her head is almost pressed against his thigh. 

“I’m really sorry. I don’t know what came over me. You’re my best friend, Jules. Always have been, always will be. Promise.” His voice rang with such sincerity, and the last of her anger melted away. She lifts her head and moves forward slightly to place it on his leg. He visibly relaxes and starts braiding her hair. 

“You’re forgiven. For now. Just..don’t do it again.” She could feel his entire body shake with how forcibly he nods his head. 

“It won’t. Scouts Honor. It shouldn’t have happened today either. So,” he sounds cautious and unsure. “What happened today?” She winced, having forgotten about the bullies from before. She buried her face in her blanket. 

“There were these kids. Makin fun of me. Calling me names in class. Teacher couldn’t hear.” She mumbled. She felt Luke tense. Why? She wondered, but decided not to think anything of it. 

“What were their names?” Luke asks cooly, sounding...angry? She had never seen Luke angry before. He was always relatively calm, thinking anger was a nasty emotion that was for “mean people only, Julie”. She listed off the few that she remembered. 

“Why?” She asks, simply out of curiosity's sake. She feels Luke shrug. 

“No reason.” He finishes the braid he was working on, and starts taking it out so he can start again, but Julie stops him. 

“Hang on.” She reaches into the pockets of her jeans and fishes out a hair tie, fastening the braid tightly. She smiles up at him, and he looks so content and happy when he smiles back. 

“Hey! Wanna write something?” he asks her, voice full of hope and eagerness. She grins. 

“Absolutely.” she replies, already lunging for their notebook. This is something they’ve been doing recently. Writing songs like they write with her mom, except just the two of them. Juile loves it. She has the music she makes with her mom, the music she makes with Luke, and then the music they make together. She couldn’t be happier, and soon, the thoughts of the bullies lulled away to the sound of their voices singing half-made melodies and unstrung lyrics. 

(They stay like that for hours, laying there in their crawlspace, writing and laughing)

((And if the next day, Luke notices that all of the names she listed off have shaving cream mysteriously filling their locker, he doesn’t mention it))

(((Julie does officially meet Alex and Reggie the next day too. She likes them more than she thought she would)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title: Plan by: Scott Folan
> 
> i cannot speak highly enough of Scott Folan’s music, it is sooo good. 
> 
> not sure when the next chapter will be up (i’m running out of pre-written chapters yikes), but be on the look out!


	4. you are the rock to my roll

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! hope you’ve all been great! sorry about the inconsistent updates, i promise i’m trying to get better! 
> 
> this was probably my favorite chapter that i’ve written so far, so enjoy!

Luke was bouncing. On the brink of jumping. His entire body was practically vibrating with excitement. Reggie had an idea today, and he couldn’t wait to get home and tell Julie all about it. And hope that she understood…

He shook that thought out of his head. Of course she would. She was Julie for crying out loud. She understood him better than anyone. She would know how important this was to him. The final bell rang and he shot out of the room faster than lighting. He almost missed Alex rolling his eyes at his excitement to see Julie. 

Almost. 

Turning on his heel away from the eighth grade classrooms and down towards the seventh grade hall, he finally spots her. Laughing with her school friends, Flynn and Carrie. He tries to ignore the stab of jealousy in his chest that they could all have classes and spend the day together, while he could only see her in the morning and after school. 

This small age gap got on his nerves so very much. 

But all of those thoughts faded away when she saw him, her smile getting bigger as she waved goodbye to her other friends and walked over to him. She had gotten a bit taller over the past few months, but was still so much shorter than him. 

“Whats up?” It was all he could do not to explode all of his thoughts right there, about Reggie’s idea, his worries about what she would think, and everything else that had been bouncing around in his head all day. 

But, he’s trying not to scare her off, so he just shrugs and says “Not much, you?” 

Julie raises her eyebrow at him as they clear the entrance and head out towards the bus. 

“That is a boldfaced lie.” She states. It is not a question. He sighs, realizing he should’ve known better than to try and hide it, she could probably tell something was up from the moment she saw him. 

“Okay so Reggie had this idea-” He starts, and she groans good-naturedly. (no, that doesn’t make him smile, what are you talking about?)

“That is never the good start to a sentence.” Laughing, he nods. 

“You’re not wrong” He states as she climbs the stairs to the bus. Following her, he continues, “But this time, it might be. We realized at lunch today” - they sit - “that all of us play instruments” - they take off their bags and put them on the dirty bus floor - “Reggie, Bobby, and I guitar, and Alex drums,” - she starts taking out her homework - “and so Reggie thought we should start a band.” - she froze, turning to look at him. 

“Really?” She asks. He can’t read her face, so he can’t tell if she thinks it’s a good idea or not. 

“Yeah,” he exclaims, trying to express his excitement at the idea through his voice, “We could get better at our instruments, and being in a band would be great for fitting in next year in high school. It’s a perfect idea!” His thoughts are going a million miles an hour, and by the end of his little spiel, he’s bouncing in his seat again. She laughs, pressing a hand into his shoulder to keep him still. 

“That sounds like a great idea! You are really good at the guitar.” He perks up slightly at the compliment, but then remembers Bobby’s requirement. He casts his gaze down to the floor. 

“I tried to tell them to let you in too.” he says, pulling his knees up to his chest, not looking at her. “But Bobby said that you couldn’t, because he doesn’t like you.” He buried his face further and further into his knees as he kept talking. 

His friendship with Bobby had been strained ever since ‘The Incident’ last year. He wanted to be friends with Bobby, but he would pick Julie over him if he ever had to make the choice. Lucky for him, his best friend was the nicest person ever, and had forgiven Bobby for being a jerk to her. But Bobby still didn’t like her, for no apparent reason. Glancing up at her, he’s relieved to see a small smile on her face. 

“That’s okay, Luke. You’re allowed to do things with your other friends that don’t involve me. You know that, right?” He nods. 

“Yeah, I know. I just like doing things with you. And you absolutely shred on the piano.” She laughs at that. 

“I know I do. But I don’t think classical piano is really the sound the other guys wanna go for, do you?” He nods, turning towards the window.

“Not really.” A sudden thought strikes him. “Wait, if I’m in a band, can we still write music together?” The idea of no longer spending hours up in their space, laying together and writing music with her is...crushing, and the look on her face tells him she feels the same. 

“Well. I think as long as you don’t use it, and we don’t like, produce it someday, then I think we should be fine.” He sits up fully, looking over at her and wondering how he got the most amazing friend in the whole world. 

When he tells her as such, that just makes her laugh. 

(He realized later when he was alone in his room that her laughter was his favorite sound in the world.)

((Wow she really was his closest friend in the world))

(((Don’t tell Alex and Reggie)))

***

Today was the day. It was the day. They had been waiting for this day since the very first time they waited for the bus together. 

Luke and Julie had a class together. 

It sounded stupid, he knew. Who cares about sharing one class out of eight? The answer: Julie and Luke. The gap between them due to age was starting to close - he could feel it - and today was the beginning of that closing. The beauty of high school is that classes weren’t separated by grade, so everyone could have classes with everyone else. 

So a sophomore boy could have chemistry with a freshman girl. 

They both had Ms. Ratch for third period chem, and if he was being honest, he barely paid attention to his first two classes, leaving Algebra II at breakneck speed to get to A Wing where the science rooms were. 

She was already there when he got there, and he internally jumped like a little kid when he saw her, drinking in the sight. Front row lab bench, notebook and pencil already out, simple white shirt with a pocket tucked into faded mom jeans, curls down long except for the small front braid he had put in the night before. Her face lit up at the sight of him, which only fueled his excitement to see that she was just as happy to see him as he was to see her. 

He slid into the seat next to her (they were two person lab benches), practically throwing his book bag on the floor in his elation. 

“Greetings stranger” She quipped. 

“Hello there. How very nice to meet you.” That made her smile wider. Before he could say anything else, his attention was stolen away by Alex, who apparently also had this class. (He had forgotten to ask) 

“Hey Luke! Hey Julie!” He looked relaxed and happy, blissful even. Something was off. 

“Hey Alex.” Julie said, grinning slyly. Alex sent a good-natured glare her way. Luke was missing something. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Alex complained as he sat in the seat behind them. Julie’s cheshire expression didn’t change. 

“Oh nothing. I’m just thinking that your facial expression looks very similar to when you meet you-know-who this morning.” Shrugging, she turned back to her notebook, still looking coy. Aex narrowed his eyes. 

“How do you do that?”

“Do what?” she asks. 

“Pick up on...that.” He made a wild gesture to his own face, which still looked a little distant. 

“Oh, sweetie, you were not good at hiding it.” She gave a small laugh, and reached over to pat Alex on the arm. Alex was extremely disgruntled, but Luke still didn’t understand. 

Turning around as the teacher started their first day rules and regulations, he quietly whispers to her. “What was that about?”

She scrunches her nose (no, Luke does not think that’s cute - blasphemy). “Alex met a cute boy in history this morning and stared at him the entire class.” Ahh, okay. The pieces clicked together. He nodded, grinning, then turned back to the teacher. 

The rest of class went off without a hitch. 

Well. Almost. 

If he was being honest, Luke was surprised at the kind of student Julie was. He always knew she was better in school then him, and he knew kids picked on her a lot for being a teacher's pet in middle school. But these facts were easy to forget when they were just hanging out. 

Seeing her in an actual educational setting was...strange. She raised her hand to answer questions that no one else knew the answer to, she was actually engaged in the lesson and hanging on the teachers every word, and strangest of all, she laughed at the teachers dumb jokes. 

It was like, a whole different side of her that he had never met before. After class, they walked out together, Luke in dumbfounded silence as Alex and Julie kept talking about the guy from this morning. His best friend was smart. Like, really smart. 

Then, just when he thinks he can handle the idea of ‘Smart Julie’, something happens that he would think about for months.

Something that would eventually bring him to a terrifying, life chaning, earth-shattering conclusion. 

A blonde guy Luke has never seen before starts heading towards them. He’s looking intently at Julie in a way that makes something ugly curl in his chest. And the ugly thing only tightens when Julie looks genuinely happy to see this guy. 

“Nick!” Her voice was high, and she bounded forward on the front of her feet to meet this Nick halfway, leaving Alex and Luke to play catch up. 

“Julie, you have no idea how excited I am to see you. Do you know where the dance class room is? Cause I cannot find it.” The guy - Nick - leans in with his words, closer to Julie. Her eyes, Luke notices, never leave his face. 

Julie giggles. Giggles. Like, high pitched, fingertips-over-mouth giggles. The ugly thing in his chest is starting to develop a name. 

“Yeah, it’s up that way. I have that class next too. I could show you if you want?” She physically brightens at the idea, seemingly forgetting that Alex and Luke were also there. Sneaking a quick glance at Alex, Luke sees that he’s watching the scene with the same look Julie had in chemistry. 

Oh. 

Oh no. 

Julie liked this guy, didn’t she? Small pieces started to come together in his brain. The way she would sometimes get this blissful look on her face when they were in their space but refused to tell him what she was thinking about. How some days she would put a ton of effort into an outfit for seemingly no reason. The hour-long phone calls with her friend Flynn talking about an unidentified “him”. 

He hadn’t really put the pieces together because he was so focused on music all the time, he ‘rarely noticed much else’, according to Julie. But right now? He’s wishing he had. Because Julie...his Julie...is flirting. 

He could deal with watching ‘Smart Julie’ all day and twice on Sundays. But ‘Flirty Julie’ was not something he ever wanted to see again.

So lost in his own head, he almost doesn’t register Julie waving goodbye to him. Alex has to physically grab his wrist and pick it up for Luke to return the gesture. Then, with her and Nick out of sight, he and Alex head to B Lunch. 

He ignores the funny looks Reggie and Bobby are sending him. He ignores the little wave-off that Alex gives them. He ignores most of their conversation, until Reggie snaps his fingers in a eureka moment. 

“Holy Guacamole.” he exclaims, loud enough to bring Luke out of his brooding. Reggie is staring at him, eyes wide. 

“What?” his voice sounds slightly annoyed, but he’s not sure he particularly cares at the moment. 

“You figured it out didn’t you?” Reggie asks. Luke raises an eyebrow, not comprehending. Reggie whips around to Alex. “He figured it out didn’t he?” Alex moves his hand back and forth in a ‘so-so’ motion. 

“I think he’s close. Give him a few more minutes.” Reggie gives a triumphant smile and returns to his sandwich. Looking around at his friends, he feels like he missed the finale of a TV show and is trying to watch the first episode of the new season. 

“Would someone like to explain to me what I’m figuring out?” He gestures out his hand in annoyance. These boys were honestly his best friends other than Julie, but they really did get on his nerves sometimes with their inability to communicate properly. Alex rolls his eyes so hard, his head actually goes around with them before turning to face Luke. 

“That you like Julie, dude.” 

The sentence was so simple, and Alex said it with such conviction, it takes Luke a few moments to process what was said. Seconds later, he’s straight upright, staring at the other three in bewilderment, spluttering. 

“W-what? No! No I do not! She’s my friend!” he has to stop himself from saying ‘best’ because the guys will get offended. Bobby snorts. 

“Yeah, right, and Reg can play the banjo.” They all keep eating, as though they didn’t just flip his world inside out. 

He didn’t like Julie. He, Luke Patterson, did not have a crush on Julie Molina. He just didn’t. The jealousy he thought he felt today was just from first day jitters and seeing Julie in class. That was all. 

(A year later, he would call Alex from their space at 1 am, Julie curled up against his chest, fast asleep.)

((The call would end with Alex saying ‘I told you so’))

(((Luke Patterson definitely had a crush on his best friend)))

*** 

Long before that phone call however, Luke's father got a new job. Luke didn’t quite understand the details of it, all he knew is that it meant his dad would be travelling a lot and sometimes Mom would go with him. 

Which, Luke thought he wouldn’t mind. He really didn’t. He was sixteen years old, he wasn’t afraid to be home alone. 

Except...now it was almost midnight, and he’s standing outside of the Molina household in tears because he can’t stand being on his own for another second. 

Lucky for him, Julie answers the door, looking exhausted and annoyed (not cute in her big monster slippers, no, remember, he does not have a crush on her). 

Until she saw his tear-streaked face. The panic and worry wash away when he mumbles out that he just couldn’t stand being alone in the house anymore, switching to understanding. Grabbing his hand, she tugs him into the house and up the stairs, not unlike the way she had the first time they had met all those years ago. 

They reach her room and she closes and locks the door behind them, and only then does he realize what her plan is. Grinning, he reaches for her waist and hoists her up in front of him, making her squeal a little before clamping her hands over her mouth to not wake her family, carrying her over to her closet and lifting her so she can push open the ceiling and pull herself up. He doesn’t even need the chair anymore, just giving himself a small boost off of one of her shelves and hoisting himself up into the crawlspace. 

After shutting the lid, she turns on half of the lights, giving barely enough brightness to see each other. He is suddenly very aware of how small the crawlspace is, how close Julie is to him, and how inappropriate this entire situation is.

That awareness fades away however as Julie, in her infinite innocence, starts grabbing some of the pillows thrown around, and starts making them into a makeshift headboard. Catching on, he snatches a blanket and lays it out fully over the floor before placing another one on top. 

They catch each other's eyes and grin. As one, they pull their bodies underneath the ‘covers’ into their makeshift bed and lay down, looking at each other with big smiles. 

“Are you sure your parents would be okay with this?” Luke whispers. 

“Yeah,” Julie whispers back, cuddling closer until her head is on his chest. “They trust you almost as much as they trust me.” 

They drift into silence. Then, into blissful sleep. 

(Julie is right. Her parents don’t care. He eats breakfast there the next morning)

((He spends most nights there now, no matter if his parents are home or not.))

(((He sleeps better with Julie anyway)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *waggles eyebrows* eh? Eh? What’d ya think? 
> 
> Rose dies in the next chapter, and it has been established that i don’t write angst well, so that’s gonna be another short one. 
> 
> Chapter Title: Rock to my Roll by: Anabor


	5. i’ll walk through hell with you (love you’re not alone)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I’m horrible at updating. Sorry for those of you that are following the story! I’ve been totally swamped with school work lately. 
> 
> This is a relatively short and very sad chapter, so sorry in advance!

Julie was numb. 

She couldn’t feel anything. 

Couldn’t see. Couldn’t hear. Couldn’t...anything. 

She was vaguely aware of people - family, friends, strangers - bustling around her. Trying to talk to her. Comforting her. Hugging her. She just sat there, in silence. 

She couldn’t cry. That would only make it worse on her dad (who was unable to move from his spot on the couch, sobbing) and Carlos (who had spent the entire day in her arms, crying because he just wanted his mom). 

People kept trying to tug Carlos out of her embrace to hug him, and whenever they tried, she just clutched him harder, whipping her head back and forth until they backed away. 

People brought food, casseroles, pizzas, whatever. She was in charge of putting those away. She would say thank you, shift Carlos to her Tia for a bit and put the food away. 

She wouldn’t cry; she had to be strong. 

For Dad. 

For Carlos. 

For Mom. 

She is vaguely aware of her phone buzzing in her pocket, but she doesn’t think she can respond to any messages right now. Her friends are probably just worried that she's missing school. She doesn’t think she has the strength to tell them anything right now, not without losing her cool and breaking down completely. 

If she breaks down now, she’s not sure she’ll ever come back together again. 

Time becomes relative. Hold Carlos, give Carlos to Tia, put food away, take back Carlos, smile at the people offering empty words, repeat. 

So very numb.

People start trickling out of the door, until there’s only a few close family members. Looking at the clock for the first time, she realizes it's only three o’clock. It had felt like years.

Carlos has stopped crying now, sniffling every now and then. He had also moved away from her, sitting instead with their cousins (Julie didn’t have any cousins her age, they were all younger), not talking, but looking better then he had been this morning. Her dad had stopped crying too, talking with her Tia in the kitchen with a small smile on his face - leading Julie to believe that he was recalling a story about Mom. 

Silently, Julie makes her way up the stairs, towards her room. She just wants to hide, process on her own without people telling her that it’s all gonna be okay, because how could that possibly be true? Nothing will ever be okay again. Nothing. 

She curls up on her bed, and for the first time since they got the news that morning, lets herself cry. She cries and cries and cries. She doesn’t know how long she’s like that before someone is gently stroking tears off her face. She opened her eyes (when had she closed them?), but it was hard, she could barely see and her eyelids were all puffy. 

“Shhh.” Luke whispers. “Shh. Jules, I’m so sorry.” He’s barely speaking, but to her, it’s like he’s screaming. And it just marks her cry harder. He sits down beside her, and she throws herself into his arms, sobbing into his shirt. 

He doesn’t say it’s all going to be okay. He doesn’t tell her that the pain will pass. He doesn’t tell her that her mom will always be with her. Instead, he just holds her as she cries, soaking through his shirt. He gently pets her hair, making small ‘shhh’ noises every once in a while. Eventually she runs out of water, and she’s just dry heaving, which makes him speak up. 

“Jules.” He whispers, “Jules, I need you to breathe for me. Can you do that?” His voice is kind of scratchy, and she realizes her hair is wet from where his own tears had fallen on her. She shakes her head furiously, and she feels him nod as he keeps petting her hair. 

“I know, I know you don’t want to, but you’re gonna be sick if you don’t.” he never raises his voice above a whisper, and she can barely hear him. “Breathe with me, love. In-” he breathes in, and she tries to copy him, but it’s shaky and hard “-Out.” she lets out her air with him. “Good. Okay, again.”

And he just talks her through breathing and holds her until her dad comes up and says they’re going to eat dinner. Julie isn’t sure she can eat. She tells Luke that when her dad leaves, looking him in the face for the first time since he got here. 

“Julie, you have to eat. It’ll be good for you. Promise.” He offers her a small smile and nudges her with his shoulder to get up. She reluctantly leaves her spot on his chest and throws her legs to the side of the bed. 

Standing shakily, she starts towards the door, but not before Luke reaches forward and grabs her hand, squeezing it reassuringly. She tries talking again once they’re halfway to the staircase.

“ I’m s-sorry. I-i know” she hiccups “this is h-hard on everyone else t-too.” He pauses in the middle of the hall, and very suddenly pulls her into a tight hug, which she immediately returns. He rocks them softly, and she finds the motion comforting. 

“It’s okay to be sad, Jules. She was your mom. It is hard on everyone else, you’re right.” He nuzzles his nose into her neck. “But it’s allowed to be hard on you too.” They stay like that for a few more seconds before Luke lets go, taking her hand again, and gently pulling her towards the stairs. 

“Let’s go eat.” 

And she follows. 

***

The funeral is a few days after. Dahlias were littered all over the church, and no one wore black. That was what Julie had insisted on, explaining that her mom wouldn’t have wanted her funeral to be dull and sad. Instead, everyone wore yellow - bright and happy - just like Rose herself. 

Julie remembers the long line of people waiting to say their final goodbyes to her mother. She just stands, Carlos on her right and Luke to her left. Normally, the people allowed to stand next to the dais were family, but Luke had attached himself to her side the moment he had gotten there and hadn’t left, which she was grateful for. She’s not sure she could’ve gotten through these past few days without him. 

She had gone to school the day after, and when no one asked her any questions or bothered her, she knew he had told them to leave her be. Whenever she had left a class, he was always there, waiting to walk her to her next one so she didn’t have to be alone. And he had spent the past few nights at her house too, sleeping in their space, braiding her hair, singing her songs. He didn’t push her to sing with him, just humming tunes in her ear. He was holding her up today too. Not physically of course, but just his presence was helping to keep her on her feet. 

She was in charge of giving a speech about her mom, about her life. But she wasn’t sure she could. No words could express the wonder and fire that had been her mother. But maybe…

She placed a hand over her pocket. Luke had found it, two days ago when they went down to the studio, sitting on the piano. The last song her mother had written. Julie had tried to give it to him, saying she was never going to play music again, but he refused, saying that it belonged to her whether she played it or not. 

She had fully intended never to play music again, thinking there was no point if her mother wasn’t there to play with her. But when she starts up the stairs towards the platform, she knows. There's no way that words can express her mothers life. But music can. She changes directions, no longer walking towards the little speech thing, but towards the large grand piano on the other side of the stage. Then, she sits, files out her music, and - not looking at the crowd - she begins to play. 

Here's the one thing   
I want you to know…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The time line of Julie being out of music for a full year just did not line up with my story timeline, so I did something else. 
> 
> Chapter Title: Stand by You by Rachel Platten


	6. why would you ever kiss me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow, I’m not dead would you look at that. i have lost practically al motivation to write, and this chapter has been several weeks in the making, and bonus! Now I’m out of pre-written chapters. 
> 
> Sorry this took so long, I’m going to try and get the next one out faster! 
> 
> Guys, gals, and non-binary pals I present: the phone call.

Scribbling away in his notebook, Luke is lost in his own world. 

Move that chord here, make this note higher, give Reggie a solo here, maybe move that lyric there- 

“Luke!” a shrill voice snaps him out of his concentration. Looking up, he sees Trish, his girlfriend of two weeks, looking frustrated. Aww fantastic. What had he done now?

“Hey! What’s-” she immediately cuts him off. 

“I’ve been calling your name for three minutes.” Annoyed, she crosses her arms and juts out her hips. He shrugs.

“Sorry, I was a little focused. What’s up?” He honestly doesn’t remember why they started dating. Sure, she’s pretty but she’s kind of...passive. He doesn’t want to say boring, because that’s a horrible thing to think about a person, but she is pretty darn close. She gives a heavy sigh, sitting down next to him. 

Oh crap not again, not again

“We need to talk.” 

There it is. 

“About what?” He asks, as though he already doesn’t know the answer. 

“I think we should break up.” He lets his head fall slightly and shakes his head at her. 

“Why?” He already knows the answer to this one too. 

“Because...I’m just not entirely comfortable...your friend? Julie? She is definitely into you, and until you address it, I just don’t think we can be together. After you confront her,” she leans forward, grabbing his hand and tracing his thigh with her finger “then we can talk.” she whispers, in a voice that he’s sure is meant to be alluring in some way, but really just comes off as pitchy and kinda breathy. 

She saunters off to her friends that are waiting outside the main entrance, and they wrap comforting arms around her as though she was the one who just got dumped. He gives a heavy sigh, packs up his stuff, and goes in through the auditorium entrance towards his locker. Alex is already there, waiting for him. 

“Woah, who kicked your dog this morning?” he asks by way of greeting. Luke yanked open his locker and reached for his math homework.

“It happened again.” Is all he says. He doesn’t really need to say much else. Alex starts laughing. Luke shoots out his hand and smacks him. 

“Bro, it’s not funny!” Luke cries indignantly. Maybe Trish wasn’t the one, but Alex didn’t have to be so mean about it. 

“It kind of is though. What’s that make now? Four people that have dumped you because you’re too close with Julie? Or is it five? I forget.” He laughs harder at the end of his sarcastic spiel. 

“Four.” Luke grumbles. “Not five. She just wasn’t right for me.” He slams his locker shut. Alex shakes his head, still laughing slightly. 

“None of these people have been right for you. Their hair is too straight, they’re not good enough at piano, they don’t have a ‘voice like a wrecking ball’, they don’t - “ Luke reaches over and smacks him again once he catches on to what Alex is insinuating. 

“Dude, for the last time, I. Don’t. Like. Jules. Not like that, anyway. We’ve just been friends for so long. I need a partner who isn’t threatened by her.” Alex just rolls his eyes and shakes his head. 

“Don’t you get it? People are always going to be threatened by her because they see the way you look at each other.” Luke groans and throws his head back. 

“Alex. I don’t like Julie. And Julie doesn’t like me. End of conversation.” Alex snorts. 

“Keep telling yourself that. This pattern will never end if you don’t come to terms with stuff.” 

Sitting down in math class, Luke leans his head on his hand and looks over at his friend. “What pattern?” 

Alex sticks out his hand and starts making a little checklist with his fingers.  
“Go on a date with someone and then go straight to Julie’s house to sleep. Person asks you to go steady. You agree. Person realizes you’re a simp for Julie and dumps you. Repeat.” He raises an accusatory eyebrow at Luke, daring him to challenge. Luke decides it’s too early to try and nullify him. 

“Whatever dude. I’m done with this conversation. It’s too early and I just got dumped. So please, lay off me, would you?” This just made the blonde roll his eyes. 

“For now. But this conversation isn’t over.” 

No, I’m sure it’s not. Luke thought. He really cared about Alex, and all of the guys for that matter, but they just really needed to let the fever dream of him liking Julie go. Sure did he sometimes stare at her for a little too long? Yes. But she was a pretty girl that he was constantly around, so it only made sense for him to look every once in a while.

(Not in a creepy way. He understood that women - especially someone as incredible as Julie - deserved respect and were not there just for him to look at. He just sometimes liked to admire her bouncy hair and glowing skin and soft lips - woah we’re gonna stop that thought, Patterson, she is your friend, stop being weird.) 

Shaking himself out of his internal tangent, he decides to give his friend some of his own medicine. “So, speaking of.” He nudges Alex with his elbow softly, his voice peppy and his smile coy, “How’s, what’s-his-name? Willie, right?” The reaction is immediate. Alex goes bright red in the face, spluttering and pushing back in his chair, hand immediately flying to the back of his head. 

“What about him?” Alex stutters out. “We’re friends.” Luke grins knowingly, scooting forward and leaning onto his hands. 

“Well, from what Julie tells me, there’s more to it then that. Say,” He taps his chin, pretending to be deep in thought, “Who is your partner for that Battle of Lexington project again?” Alex groans and his head falls onto the table. He says something so quietly, Luke can’t hear him. Even though he has a pretty good guess as to who Alex muttered about, he was having too much fun messing with him.

“I’m sorry, what was that? Who did you say?” Alex lifts his head, glaring. 

“Willie. Willie is my partner. But that’s it! Just partners. For this one project. Where I am going over to his house to work on it.” Alex looks away when he says that last part, so he completely misses the excited look his friend is giving him. Yeah, Luke liked messing with him, but he was also over the moon for his friend. Alex had liked Willie since the beginning of the year, and going into the house was a huge step. At least, for Alex it was. 

“Dude!” He exclaims, slapping him on the shoulder and ignoring Alex’s small ‘ow’. “That’s awesome! Are you finally gonna make a move?” Immediately, Alex is shaking his head furiously at the thought. 

“Absolutely not! Are you insane, Luke? I don’t even know if he’s into guys like that, let alone into me! I’d rather just sit around and be friends with him, looking in from afar. If I tell him and he’s like, homophobic, then he’ll never talk to me again. So thanks, but no thanks.” Then, Alex drops his head back onto the desk, signaling that the conversation is over. Feeling guilty, Luke pats him on the back reassuringly. 

“I’m sorry man, I didn’t mean to freak you out. I just want to see you happy with an awesome dude someday. No guy will ever really deserve you, but Willie comes pretty darn close in my opinion.” Alex snorts, turning his head slightly to look at him. 

“Thanks man.” 

“No problem.”

“Still not happening.” 

“I figured.”

***

After a mind-numbing hour of what seemed like nonsense, Luke left his Algebra II class feeling dazed and exhausted. He really had no idea what Mr. Reyes had been talking about. He really tried, but math was just something that always seemed to escape him. It was basically written in stone that he was going to fail this upcoming test. He had a week to study - but what was the point if he didn’t know what on earth he was supposed to be studying?

His parents were starting to get on him about his grades, too. They hadn’t threatened the band yet, but he knew it was coming. Every single time they called, he could feel them getting closer and closer to telling him that he couldn’t do it anymore, and while he respected and loved his parents beyond belief, they just didn’t understand. They didn’t have faith in Sunset Curve, not like Luke did. 

Clambering onto the bus (he could not afford a car), he stumbled to his seat and slammed his head against the back of it. He didn’t want to disappoint his parents, but he wasn’t willing to give up on the guys either. Lost in thought, it takes a few seconds for him to register Julie waving her hand in front of his face repeatedly, calling his name. But unlike his ex this morning, when he finally comes to, she looks amused. 

“You good there, buddy? You look like you’re dying.” She jokes. He’s not in the joking mood, but it makes him smile a bit. 

“I might be. If my grades don’t come up, my parents might cut the band.” Julie’s jaw drops. She loves Sunset Curve almost as much as he does, and the idea of his parents cutting it is horrific. 

“What, why?” She asks incredulously. 

“They think I’m not applying myself in school. I am! It just...this stuff,” He gestures at the pile of papers in his lap that he hadn’t bothered to put in his book bag after class, “it doesn’t make any sense. I just don’t get it. And if I don’t get it, they’re going to cut Sunset Curve.” He throws his head back again, running his hand through his hair, wondering how he could possibly keep the band if his parents won’t let him. 

Julie reaches for the top paper - tonight’s homework that he will try and then give up on in ten minutes - scanning over it quickly before snapping her fingers. 

“I know this! Systems of Equations! I learned this last year.” Luke groaned. Julie was only a sophomore and was able to do math at what was supposed to be his level. 

“So it’s not hard, I’m just stupid.” He mumbled, mostly to himself, before reaching over and trying to snatch the paper back from her, but she dodged his lunge. 

“No, it’s actually really hard. One of the higher level Algebra II topics. And no, you’re not stupid; math just doens’t come easily to some people.” Looking over the sheet one more time, she then looked up at him (she was still so much shorter than him, even when sitting.) He could see ‘Smart Julie’ starting to come out - the part of her he was only used to seeing in Chemistry class. He knew that she was probably trying to help but she was only making it worse. He felt like a moron who didn’t understand something someone younger than him had learned before him. 

“I could teach it to you, if you want?” 

Wait, what? 

“I understand this stuff, and I know your learning style a little bit better than your teacher at the moment, so I could show you how to do it?” She sees the look on his face and misinterprets it. “Or not, sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset, I just-“ He cuts her off. 

“No, no, that’d be awesome. I learn chemistry better from you, so I probably learn Algebra II from you better too.” A wide smile splits her face, and she looks genuinely excited. 

“Great! We can start when we get back to the house and go until band rehearsal? That way it’s a decent chunk of time, but not so long we completely fry your brain. And if we wait until we get home, it gives you some decompressing time and me time to look at the material. But if that doesn’t work then we can try some other time.” 

‘Smart Julie’ is definitely less sure of herself then His Julie, which doesn’t make sense because Smart Julie is absolutely amazing. 

“Nah, when we get home works for me. It’s not like I had much else to do anyway except watch you do your homework and pretend to do mine.” She laughs, then reaches over and takes the rest of his papers to look over. 

(still his favorite sound)

((Instead of relaxing on his way home, he watches her, eyes zipping over pages of numbers and letters, intently scribbling in the margins on his notes.))

(((She looks absolutely adorable, but he’d never say that out loud)))

***

“Okay, then move that x there and boom! You did it!” Luke started at the page of scribbles in front of him. 

“Is that the right answer though?” He’s not really sure he did that negative correctly. Julie leans over his shoulder to check his work, (he ignores how nice she feels pressed up against his back) eyes doing the scanning thing they were doing on the bus. She suddenly smiles all big, jumping up and clapping her hands childishly. 

“Yes it is! Great job, Luke!” He laughed, excited at the fact that he finally - finally - understood what was going on. After only an hour of work with Julie, he was able to do most of the homework problems on the page by himself - and do them correctly too.

He jumped out of his chair and grabbed her, making her giggle and squeal in joy, hugging her close and spinning her around in a circle. She laughed and laughed and laughed. He wanted to do this forever, just to make her keep laughing like that, without a care in the world. 

But eventually he got dizzy and he had to set her down, but he continued to hold her tight even after the spinning was done. She pulled back from his chest ever so slightly, looking up into his eyes. She wasn’t laughing anymore, but there was something in her eyes. She was only a few inches down from his face. He could easily just lean forward and just...press his mouth to hers. 

(Her lips looked so soft.)

He’s leaning down before he can even register what he’s doing. But then there’s a momentary panic that she’ll think he’s being weird. 

And then she’s leaning up and there’s a certainty in his mind that ‘yes, he’s about to kiss Julie, and no, he doesn’t want to stop leaning ever so slightly more forward and forward and forward.’ He can almost feel a wisp of her breath on his lips when - 

“Julie! I’m home! Do you know what’s for snack? Is Luke here? Does Luke know what’s for snack? Hello? Anyone home?” Carlos screams into the house. Spell broken, Julie jumps back so far from him, it was almost like he was on fire. 

Her face is all red and she frantically tucks her hair behind her ears, darting out of the room to greet her brother. Gasping for air like he’d just run a marathon, he collapses back into the chair he had been sitting in, math papers long forgotten. 

He had been about to kiss Julie. His best friend, Julie. Willingly. Not on a dare or extenuating circumstance, but because he wanted to. Like, really wanted to. But that was weird because he didn’t like Julie. Not like that. 

Right? 

***

Rehearsal gave him something to focus on other than his almost-kiss with Julie. Wailing out on his guitar had always made things so much better, letting him release his emotions into music and jumping around on stage.

The only problem was that...Julie was there. 

It wasn’t unusual for her to attend band rehearsal, in fact, it would probably have been weird if she hadn’t. Just sitting in the corner minding her own business, working on homework. She offered the occasional tip for their music - a riff here, a lyric change there - but for the most part she was just there because she wanted to support the band. And because her (other) best friend was their kinda-sorta-but-not-really manager. Flynn was great - she booked them gigs and ran their social media, and she would even bring snacks to rehearsal because she knew sometimes the boys forgot to eat. But Flynn was not Lukes focus today. 

Luke’s focus today was rehearsal. Because rehearsal gave him something else to think about other than the crushing feeling he had when Julie had come back in and pretended nothing had happened. Something to focus on that wasn’t how her breath had smelled like watermelon candy. Something to focus on that wasn’t Julie’s complete dismissal of what seemed to be kind of a big deal (to him). 

And so, with his focus settled, he shredded and shouted and sang, bouncing around with Bobby, singing directly at Alex, and sharing a mic with Reggie. He tried to avoid looking in Julie’s direction, because he knows if he does, he’ll just scream ‘What the heck was that?!?’, and not let her leave until she answers. 

Okay so maybe he’s not as fully focused as he wants to be. 

Luckily though, it doesn’t show in his music. If anything, it makes his practice better due to his pent up emotions. 

But then, alas, rehearsal is over. Almost as soon as it started. And he has to face the question that’s been sitting in the back of his mind. 

Will I sleep at Julie’s tonight? 

He didn’t want it to be weird if he came by after dinner like he normally did, but he also wasn’t sure if he could actually sleep without her. It had been almost a solid year since he had spent the night without her by his side, and she had become like his teddy bear when he was younger - something to hold close and protect and cuddle while he was away in dreamland. It was also nice to know that she was safe and asleep and...yeah he was gonna sleep at the Molina’s house. No matter how awkward it might turn out tonight, he was more than willing to risk it if it meant that he could be with Julie. 

So that is exactly how he ended up sitting on the living room floor of the Molina residence at 6 o’clock, after eating at his house, showering, and changing his clothes, he was playing cards with Carlos while he waited for Julie to get back from taking out the trash. 

“Dude, you suck at this.” Carlos commented as Luke lost…again. 

“Sorry, little man. I’m a little distracted.” He says as he leans back against the couch. 

“Why?” He asks, tilting his head. 

“Just uhhh...school stuff.” I wanted to kiss your sister even though I don’t think I like her like that. But he wasn’t about to say that to Carlos. 

“Oh yeah. Julie says high school is a living nightmare.” Luke laughs. 

“It really is. Your sister probably has it harder than me though, she actually does the work.” Carlos’ response is cut off by another voice. 

“I dunno. Based on the math I saw today, you could put in the work if you really tried, dork.” Julie whooshed in the door, closing it behind her. Luke doesn’t get momentarily distracted by a loose hair flying out and desperately wanting to tuck it behind her ear. He doesn’t. Because today was a fluke, an anomaly, and it would never happen again. 

“Mmmm, nah. Sounds hard. Don’t wanna.” Testing the waters a little bit, desperate to get rid of this icky feeling in his chest, when she sits down on the couch next to him, he collapses into her lap like a small child. She giggles at his antics (his heart flips, but he ignores it) and buries her hand into his hair, playing with it. He preenes like a friggin cat, leaning into her touch and closing his eyes. 

He couldn’t believe a couple hours ago he thought this was going to be awkward. It was Julie. How could it be? 

Or at least...that’s what he thought. 

Because eventually Carlos had to go to bed and it was just the two of them. Which wasn’t too bad. They just sat in comfortable silence, Julie playing with his hair. But then Julie started yawning, so he suggested they head upstairs to sleep. And as Julie headed towards the closet, Luke followed her - lifting her up and over into their space, having almost completely forgotten that ugly feeling until they were laying down, and as she turned over to face him, he realized how close their faces were.

He was overwhelmed by that feeling again. He really wanted to kiss her. He really, really did. And if he looked close enough at her face, he could’ve sworn she wanted to kiss him too. But luckily some small part of her brain was still thinking logically, even if his wasn’t, so instead she opened her mouth and asked a question. He was so focused on her lips he didn’t hear the question. 

“W-what?” He shakes himself a little - almost comically. She gives a soft laugh, probably thinking he was lost in his own head about music or something. 

“I was asking if you were okay. You’ve been a little off today.” And his heart sunk. Of course. She didn’t see their almost-kiss as a big deal. Because that’s not how she saw it. Because she didn’t...she didn’t feel the same way. But that didn’t make any sense because it's not like he felt that way...not about her…right? That wouldn’t make any sense. But…

He was thinking so hard, he almost didn’t realize he had never answered her question until she poked his shoulder. 

“Dude, I can almost hear your gears grinding. What’s up?” 

But in that moment he was struck by the most horrible realization. And he couldn’t tell her. He could not ever ever ever tell her, it would ruin everything. Plastering a fake smile on his face, the same one he wore with his parents, he gave a laugh. 

“Nothing. I’m just distracted by band stuff, y’know?” She looked a little miffed, and it was clear on her face that she didn’t believe him, but she let it slide, smiling back. 

“Oh, okay. Well. Good Night.” And then she closed her eyes and placed her head on his chest. In a few minutes, her breathing slowed and her entire weight was on his chest. 

But he couldn’t sleep. He was wide awake. He wasn’t sure if he could ever sleep again. He doesn’t know how long he lays there, but eventually he can’t take it anymore. He shifted ever so slightly, careful not to wake Julie, and fishes his phone out of his pajama pockets. He clicks on the first name he sees. It happens to be Alex. It only rings twice before he answers. 

“Hello?” Alex’s voice is wide awake, which is strange because Luke is pretty sure that its past midnight. 

“What are you doing up?” He demands, concern for his friend overriding his internal crisis for a second. 

“Homework. I got an essay due tomorrow. Why are you up?” Aaaaand his crisis was back. 

“I didn’t know.” He blurts out. He must sound panicked because there’s worry in Alex’s voice when he speaks again. 

“Didn’t know what, Luke?” 

“I didn’t know.” The full realization is creeping up on him, like a beast that hoping to eat him alive. “You guys were always making hints and comments, but I didn’t know.” 

“Luke. You’re scaring me. It’s 1 am and you’re rambling on about not knowing something. Is there someone in the house?” Luke shook his head, but then realized Alex couldn’t see him. 

“No. There’s no one in the house. I just-“ He lost his words. 

“You what, Luke?” 

“I like Julie. Not in a friendly way. A lot. I like Julie a lot in a not friendly way.” 

Silence. 

Then. 

“D-dude!” Luke whisper yells as to not wake Julie. “Are you- Are you laughing?” 

Alex was practically howling, it was a miracle he wasn’t waking up anyone in his house.

“Yes Luke, I’m laughing. Because you’re talking as if the world is ending and in actuality you’ve only come to terms with emotions that the rest of us have on a regular basis.” 

‘It’s not funny!” 

“Oh, but it is. Because now you know I was right. You were jealous of Nick, weren’t you? Oh ho ho, this is too good.” 

“You’re not helping. This could ruin the best friendship I’ve ever had.” That makes Alex stop. “Lex’, I can’t...I can’t loose her. Not like this.” 

“Did you consider that it wouldn’t ruin anything at all?” Now it was Luke's turn to laugh. 

“Good one. It would Alex. It would ruin everything.” Alex gives a deep heavy sign and mumbles something that sounds an awful lot like ‘one step forward two steps back’. 

“Alright. If that’s what you think. I’m just saying this might not be as world ending as you’re making it out to be.”

“I don’t think you’re right. But you should probably get back to your essay.” He resigns himself that Alex doesn’t understand how much this would tank the most important relationship in his life. 

“Yeah. I should. But before I go. Luke?” He sounds amused, but Luke is stupid so he responds anyway. 

“Yeah?” 

“I told you so.” And then he hung up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty doodle that’s that. Hope it was worth the wait! Keep your eye out for the next chapter! Since I probably won’t update before then: Happy Holidays everybody! 
> 
> Chapter Title: Heather by Conan Gray

**Author's Note:**

> Ba-Ba! (did you like it? i really hope you did)
> 
> i have the second chapter at the ready, but i don't know when i'm gonna post it. 
> 
> these first few chapters are just going to be setting up the friendship, them meeting the rest of the band, Flynn, Carrie, Nick, etc. they aren’t going to really be apart of the main story, just the setup
> 
> This one is also far shorter than the other ones i have written, so sorry bout that 
> 
> Chapter title: I Think I’m Gonna Like It Here from Annie
> 
> see y'all soon!


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